Day 1 of the New Apartment

Today, is DAY ONE of my move to my new apartment! 

Bill and I moved to Galveston in 2021 to be near our daughter, Shelly. We settled into a two-bedroom apartment not far from her, but when I had to place Bill in a nursing home, my budget couldn’t stretch to cover that space anymore. So, I downsized to a small, 725-square-foot, one-bedroom apartment on the western side of Galveston. This place was far from perfect—tiny, run-down, hurricane-damaged, bad HVAC, and barely holding together. It wasn’t ideal, but it got me through a tough time. 

Now that Bill is in the VA memory care, my budget has stabilized, so I decided it was time for an upgrade. My goal? To find a "forever home"—as forever as anything can be in hurricane territory—somewhere close to Shelly, who lives in the midtown area, and near the places where I spend most of my time, like OLLI and UU.

While I was searching, I came across a brand-new complex called The Cove at Galveston Yacht Basin. It was so new they weren’t even giving tours yet, but I knew this was the right spot for me. In August, I put down a deposit to snag my ideal apartment, making sure it had all the features I wanted: morning sun, a higher floor for flood safety, and a nice view. The complex officially opened last month, and I’m moving in this week!

My new place is 1200 square feet, on the 3rd floor, and overlooks a courtyard with a pool, cabanas, grills, and even a pickleball court. Maybe I’ll give pickleball another try! The convenience of this apartment is hard to beat: I can either take the elevator up or drive up to the third story of the attached parking garage and walk straight into my place. For Oreo potty breaks, I can take the 3-story stairs for more exercise! 

Here’s a fun fact—I calculated that, thanks to less traffic and central location, I’ll save about seven hours a week in travel time! That’s seven more hours to do what I love - crafting, playing my keyboard, and hanging out with friends. In the map below, you can see where Shelly is located and where my new apartment is. The blue dot on the bottom left marks my old place.

I chose an interior unit facing the courtyard, with a view of palm trees, the pool, and the pickleball court. The exterior units didn’t have what I wanted, plus I figure this spot gives me a little more protection from hurricanes. Fingers crossed, right? 

The photo below shows where my apartment is situated on the island. The shipping channel and the Gulf surround this area, making it scenic and peaceful. Downtown is just a short drive (or walk) away, there’s a park across the street, with squirrels for Oreo, and everything I enjoy—like OLLI and UU—is within a mile. The ferry to Bolivar is nearby too, so Oreo and I will have plenty of places to explore on our walks.

My apartment layout below. The 2nd BR will be my crafting room. My piano will be in living room as the centerpiece - I'm determined to give a concert someday! Haha!  

Today, I'll be getting internet installed and taking over my clothes, some food, a chair or two, and one of Oreo's beds. Then back here to pack some more. I'll post some more as the week goes by. 

A Day Full of Surprises!

Yesterday’s visit with Bill was both pleasant and full of surprises. Since I’ve stopped taking him out of the complex due to his mobility challenges, I’ve had to get creative with how we spend our time “out and about.”
 
On my way to the care home, I picked up some snack pack lunches with crackers, cheese, meat, and salads, as well as cookies for dessert. I also picked up a big gift box of cookies for the staff – always a good thing to do. They love it, so I try to take them some kind of goodies once a month. 
 
When I arrived, Bill was snoring away, waiting for his exercise class to start. The residents had gotten flu shots the day before, and everyone seemed a bit drowsy.
 
It was also haircut day. We have a new female barber who does a great job with the residents. She agreed to let me photograph her in progress! He was so proud of his haircut!

Best Barber Ever! 

For lunch, we headed outside to the beautiful, enclosed patio attached to the memory care unit. It’s a safe space with locked gates, so no one can wander off. The weather was perfect, and Bill seemed to really enjoy being outdoors. 
 
After lunch, I took him for a walk to the other side of the complex where the independent living and assisted living residents live. They have it all decorated for Halloween, including several new resident skeletons! 

Later, we bumped into Bill’s psychiatrist – a delightful man who took the time to stop for a nice chat. He told me that Bill is “teaching him how to fly a Cessna” during their sessions. I mentioned how strange it is that Bill cannot remember anything from the last 30 years, but still knows how to fly. The doctor shared a story about another of his patients who consistently remembers two things: his wife and how to play the piano. He can’t read music anymore, but he’s still fabulous on the keys. Alzheimer’s is a very strange disease! 
 
We finally ended up back in his unit in time to get dessert. Although he’d already eaten lunch with me, he couldn’t resist sitting down for the sweet potato pie that was being served. While waiting for the pie to be served, we chatted with the other resident at our table who announced that he was a Texas Ranger. That’s when things got interesting. Bill replied back that he was a pilot. The Ranger quipped back, “Oh, I probably shot you down.” I wasn’t sure if that was a joke or not?!
 
Bill then went on to explain how he was a demolition expert. He followed that with a story about building a bomb and using the bomb he built to detonate another bomb. I have no idea where this came from. TV? Conversations with other residents? Or is it the truth? Don’t they have to go to a special school to do bomb demolition? Why had I not heard about this before? When I asked, Bill said, “It’s secret stuff.” 

Whether it’s true or a figment of his new imagination, Bill seemed to have a good day. He enjoyed the food, the conversation, and my visit. I left feeling happy because he was happy. What could be better than that?  

No More Wheelchair?

There are always new changes with Alzheimer’s. Today, I had to face the tough reality that I can no longer take Bill out in the car with me. His upper body is still fairly strong, but now he needs professional assistance to get in and out of the wheelchair. He’s been falling more often, and it’s become a serious risk. I can’t chance him falling while we’re out. Not only could it hurt Bill, but at my age, it could seriously hurt me too. Bill doesn’t understand why we can’t go out like we used to, but the nurses at the VA are working with me to come up with new ways for him to feel like he’s “going out.”  

Today, I drove to Houston a little later than usual so I would arrive in time for exercise class. He sees me and smiles. I can see he’s happy I’m there. Then he goes back to throwing and catching the big blue balloon, one of his favorite exercises.    

 

After the workout, we have lunch together. I had stopped at HEB on my way to Houston to pick up a veggie/fruit/cheese snack pack and two salads to supplement the lunch provided by the VA. Bill enjoyed the “goodies” and then polished off his VA meal, as well! I ate my salad and then realized the snack pack was gone before I had a chance to get any. Next time, I’ll buy two!  

 

Next, I tell him we’re going “to a party.” The VA is divided into four pods – three for independent and assisted living, and the fourth is the locked memory care unit. There’s a celebration happening in one of the other pods, and we’re invited. 

 

I buy him a coke at the vending machine and off we go. He’s delighted to be out of the locked unit, drinking his coke, and chatting with the people he meets. Most of them know who he is and call him by name. He may not remember them, but he always says hello and asks how they are doing. He definitely enjoys the attention.  

 

The VA does a great job with these events – there’s always music, speakers, and food. Sometimes they have games and prizes. It depends on the day. Today is a musical celebration. I enjoy the outing because I can just sit and talk with Bill. I don’t have to worry about transportation or fall risks. Best of all, if he needs to go to the bathroom, someone from the medical staff goes with him. I don’t have to leave my seat! 

Our Activity Director: Marilyn - What a nice voice!
Let the video run and you'll see the whole crew! 

All in all, it was a good day. Bill was happy most of the day. No sundowning. No paranoia. No accidents. No yelling or getting angry. He was sad when I told him I was leaving, but the nurse gently guided him to his room, and I quietly slipped out. 

After the long drive home, I parked the car and opened the trunk to take out the wheelchair. I rolled it into the apartment and tucked it in my closet. As I closed the door, I found myself wondering, “Will it ever be used again?” I briefly consider giving it away, but then remember my own age. “I better save it. Someday, it could be me in the wheelchair.”  

Bill and the Houston Ship Channel

Today, I decided to take Bill to LaPorte and watch the ships go by. When I got to the VA, they had him all ready to go - no problems with his Rx. So off we went on our adventures.

 First, we went to Sylvan Beach Park. Unfortunately, with his vision, he couldn't see the ships from the parking lot. So, I continued to drive up along the waterways and landed at the Monument Inn Restaurant on the Houston Ship Channel. The restaurant was listed as handicapped accessible, so I thought, "Perfect, let's grab a bite to eat here."

I soon discovered, however, that the restaurant is on the 2nd floor, and there was NO elevator in sight. Instead, I spotted a broken-down "chair lift" running up to the 2nd floor. Even if it were fixed, it wouldn't work for Bill. So, I left Bill in the foyer and went upstairs to ask how I was supposed to get him up to the 2nd floor. The staff replied, "Oh, we'll bring you up in the freight elevator."

Let me tell you - the freight elevator is an experience I do not want to repeat! We were directed through several downstairs hallways, past a scaffold where a construction crew was busy repairing the ceiling, and then into a huge, metal box. As it clanked and rattled its way up, we got a lovely view of concrete walls, wires, and metal gates.

Once upstairs, I had to push Bill through the worst part of the kitchen area on narrow, thin, blue carpets that were thrown helter-skelter over bumps, puddles, and kitchen chaos. The server that directed us, John, helped me push my husband over a 2" high obstacle that I would not have been able to navigate by myself. This so-called "path" eventually led us to the restaurant itself, where it finally became worth the effort.

First, the view was fantastic. Huge picture windows gave us a front-row seat to ships of all shapes and sizes gliding back and forth along the channel right in front of us.

Next, our server brought us a huge plate of rolls - both yeast rolls and sweet breakfast buns! I almost filled up on the bread! We both ordered seafood - a combo of fried and grilled fish, salads, onion rings and ff. The food was delicious, even though there was too much fried food for me. I enjoyed the salad, a couple onion rings and the stuffed crab.

We did meet another obstacle at bathroom time - the doors and stalls are too small for wheelchairs. With no room to navigate, we had to skip the bathroom break. Thankfully, we made the whole day without accidents. (Note to self: this place is NOT handicapped accessible even though it is advertised as such.)

The best part of the day was how happy Bill was. He couldn't stop smiling and saying what a great day it was. He laughed, talked about the 70's and 80's (currently where his mind is), and watched the ships go by. We discussed his family, the pets we've owned, our kids, his college campus, and his fraternity friends. I'm amazed at how he has no concept of time, no memories of the past 30-40 years, yet still remembers his old friends and his college town. Thankfully, we've been married since 1970, so he still remembers me!

Afterwards, we took a brief ride around the San Jacinto monument and then back to the VA.

All in all it was a successful day. But, no, I won't be taking him for a repeat visit . . . I refuse to experience the "FRIGHT elevator" ever again!

Guiding an Improved Dementia Experience (GUIDE) Model

 I wish I could explain this, but apparently there are some new resources from Medicare in 2025 for people with Dementia and their caregivers. I looked it up on Medicate and found this link:

https://www.cms.gov/priorities/innovation/innovation-models/guide

I suggest that you contact your family care practitioner and helpfully they can explain what it is and how you can benefit. Here's hoping! 

Here's a blog post about it: https://www.cms.gov/blog/guiding-improved-dementia-experience-clearing-path-comprehensive-high-quality-dementia-care

This is a little bit more clear: https://www.morganlewis.com/blogs/healthlawscan/2024/03/medicares-new-dementia-guide-model-how-can-physicians-hospices-and-home-health-agencies-participate

Bill's Birthday and "Special Angels"

Today is Bill's birthday, so my goal was to pick him up, take him for a ride, and then take him to Texas Roadhouse for lunch as that is his favorite restaurant. 

Knowing that Lasik is not our friend and that the message to the nurse to hold his Lasik a few hours has not always been easy to get to the right person, I contacted the VA three times. Yesterday, I called the Director of Nurse, April. She did not answer, but I left a message. Last night I called POD B, the memory care unit, and left a message; and this morning, I call the new day nurse on duty on POD B and talked to her on the phone. (This is the same nurse who did not give the message last time, so I told her what I wanted, asked her if she understood the message, and then told her I would be really upset if I got there and my husband had been given Lasik.)

Sure enough, I get there and the medication nurse had not gotten the message! Needless to say, I came unglued. The nurse at the desk whom I had talked to on the phone, just shrugged like it wasn't her problem. One of the nearby aids said, "Just take him out for a short while." At that, I blew up, bringing out nurses from all corners of the facility.

The medication nurse, Valerie, who is a gem, and Verna, who calls herself my "Guardian Angel," came over and asked me to come to Verna's office. Both Verna and Valerie gave me their direct phone numbers so I can call them anytime I need anything. I was happy with that, but this was Bill's birthday. How was I going to deal with Bill on his birthday?

They came up with an answer! Valerie came with me! She took care of Bill the whole time - getting him in and out of the car and restaurant, taking him to the bathroom, and making sure we had a positive experience. It was so much faster with a helper - no waiting to get in and out of the locked unit, a helper to get equipment in and out of the facility and car, and I could take care of the restaurant issues while she took care of Bill. 

So it turned out to be a good day after all, and now I have a direct number to my guardian angels! Hopefully, this will solve the problem for future visits. 

Bill had a great birthday lunch of filet mignon, applesauce, and sweet potato. The manager of the Texas Roadhouse even brought him a free brownie and ice cream for his birthday! The only downside was he had such a good time, he couldn't understand why he couldn't go home with me when I had to leave. That made me sad. And, yes, there were more tears. But I am so grateful for a caring staff who made Bill's day a good one. And, I was told there will be consequences for the "shrugging nurse." Not everyone is cut out to work in a Memory Care unit. It takes special angels to do that work, like Valerie and Verna. If you know any special angels who work in Memory Care, give them a big hug. They deserve it. 

Lasix - Don't leave the Nursing Home With it!!

I called the VA home yesterday afternoon and reminded them that I was coming and not to give Bill his Lasix. They give him Lasix to keep his leg swelling down, but it makes him pee all the time. So, when I go up, I ask them to delay giving it to him until after we have been out. 

Apparently, the person who took the message didn't get it to the medication nurse. She had already given it to Bill when I got there. I decided to go ahead and take him out because he LOVES to go for car rides. 

I decided to take him to a new-for-us, Tex-Mex restaurant in downtown Houston called, Ninfa's. His joints weren't working real well, but we managed to get him in my RAV4 and off we went. 

Bill enjoyed the cityscape. We were talking about how big Houston is when he said he thought he saw the Twin Towers. "The Twin Towers are gone," I said. He looked at me in disbelief. He has no memory of that. I guess that is a good thing. 

We lucked out with parking and got a spot right in the front. It is a beautiful restaurant in a nice area. 

We ordered chicken and shrimp fajitas for our meal. They came out steaming hot! The chicken and shrimp were both cooked to perfection. Sides included salsa, rice, beans, sour cream, avocado, and pico de Gallo. 

It was delicious! But before we got too far into our meal, the Lasix kicked into high gear. Bill had to go to the bathroom. I took him to the men's room and turned on my timer for 15 minutes - the usual amount of time it takes him to finish. Some nice guest in the restaurant brought him back in ten minutes! 

He ate one of the fajitas and then he had to go again! So, back he went for another 15 minutes. This time our server helped him back out to the table.

He finished up his fajita just in time for key lime pie. He ate his pie and then, you guessed it, he had to go again! So back he went for another 15 minutes.

I paid the bill and, this time, I went in the bathroom myself and rescued him. I had barely gotten him in the car when he said he had to go again! He started shaking his arms and banging the car door. I told him to go ahead and go in his underwear (he has depends on). That seemed to do it. After that he settled down and enjoyed the ride home. The nurse later told me he doesn't go that often when he's at the VA. I'd never seen him go that much either. So who knows, but I will make sure that next time he gets no Lasix on the days I go if I have to call two or three times ahead! 

We had a good time in spite of the Lasix. He enjoyed the ride and the food. When he got back to the VA, the aide put him in the shower and I left. A fairly good day.